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Just another Manly Monday

So, it’s a beautiful week here in rural Pennsylvania. Spring has sprung right ahead into summertime and we’ve broken out the warm weather clothes at long last. As such, it’s time to reflect on what it means to be manly. I hope you found the video guide above to be helpful. I will elaborate on the points from my own manly perspective.

Manly Communication

A manly man is known for the words he speaks. The more seldom he speaks, the more profound his eventual utterances wind up being. Society has long admired the laconic loner. Our folk heroes are manly men who brave the elements and live to tell the tale. Whether or not they tell you their tale depends on how they hold you in their masculine esteem.

Grunt

When faced with a fellow manly man, the most basic form of communication is the grunt. A good grunt is worth a thousand words. A grunt given in passing on the street can say “Hey, how’s it?” or “Hey, I like the same sports team as the one you’re wearing on your shirt or hat.” or even “Hey, I wish I was as goddamned manly as you.” So, the next time you’re passing by another masculine individual on the streets of town, give a nod and a grunt of acknowledgement. You might just make the fellow’s day.

Speak The Lingo

If you should find yourself in a situation where the grunt is insufficient to express all that needs to be said, there is a special guy language that you can rely on to pass the pregnant pauses in life. Those long elevator trips, waiting for mass transit, riding mass transit, waiting for your beer at the bar all provide uncomfortable silences that can either be indulged in by the hyper-manly frontiersman or bridged by the more civilized and gregarious among us. Some options are as follows:

{Hot/Cold/Windy/Rainy/Bright/Dark/Dry/Humid} enough for ya?
How ’bout dem {relevant sports team}?
How’s it hangin’?

Nebulous topics help break the ice between manly men. You might kill the time that would be wasted by an uncomfortable silence or you might discover yet another brother from another mother. I can’t tell you how often a manly opening has led to a deep philosophical discourse and even lifelong friendships. Try it. You might like it.

Hide Your Emotions

I remember watching Rosie Greer singing “It’s alright to cry.” when I was a kid. The big tough football star was singing from the heart and it stuck with me these many decades later. That being said, a manly man is easily identified by his strong desire to appear to have been carved from stone or petrified wood. It is manly to have deep emotions, but it is not manly to show them in public. For instance, the guards at Buckingham Palace stand there for hours on end like tin soldiers. Fine uniforms. Stoic, icy demeanor. Huge beaver hat. You don’t get much more manly than that. They’re human beings in spite of it all. They have feelings but they’ll never show you any while they’re on duty. That’s manliness that’s distilled and re-distilled like cognac! Few among us can manage that kind of stony detachment, but it doesn’t stop us from trying.